The sun is setting, and I'm off to do a really quiet celebration of Samhain. I've been REALLY conflicted about this sabbat, feeling that I shouldn't celebrate it until I completely understand it (among other worries) - and since I really can't get my head around it yet, at all, I was all for trying to forget it was happening.
I confessed this to The Girl, my wonderful Jewish wife, who told me a story. Once upon a time, it was the eve of Passover. Three rabbis had been debating for hours, as rabbis do. They were debating how many plagues there had been in Egypt. There couldn't possibly have been only ten plagues. Were there a hundred? A thousand? More? On and on they debated, as the sun set. Then there was a knock on their door. They opened it to see a small group of concerned-looking students. "Rabbis," they said. "You're late for the service."
So I've been offline today, trying to work through some of this conflicted-ness, and much other stuff too. But I wanted to leave a Samhain blessing. This is a little gift for my dear Pagan friends (not having met most of you does not make you any less friends), who have been so supportive while I try to find my feet on my very personal path. Blessed Samhain. For tonight, I'm going to stop arguing about the number of plagues and go to the service.
Celtic Christian blessings and reflections on winter, death and time
Remember, O friend, your end.
Now you are strong and fit, filled with ambition, boasting of your achievements; but all your success is a mere passing shadow.
Remember you are made of clay, and to clay you will return.
Now you are healthy and handsome, filled with energy, proud of your work; but all your joys are mere passing shadows.
Remember your life is the breath of God, which at death will depart.
Now your life on earth is solid and stable; but soon it will dissolve, your body crumbling to dust.
Remember, O friend, your end.
- Celtic Christian poem
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The face of nature is solemn in winter, her breath chill, and her eyes pale.
Ducks shiver as they float on icy ponds; the sea heaves, its waves beating against the cliffs.
The birds' song is muffled and sad, as they search for scraps of food; only the ravens are glad, feeding on crimson blood.
The tiny animals are asleep in their holes, with food for the winter; the cattle and sheep huddle for warmth.
The trees are bare, the wind whistling through their branches; the earth is barren and dark, covered with black wet leaves.
The men cut wood for the fire, while the women cook hot, thin soup; people contemplate death, when they shall meet their creator.
- Translated by Robert Van de Weyner from ancient British and Irish poems on the seasons
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The month of November, the swine are plump.
The trees are now half bare, the leaves half fallen.
The brown floor turns black and sodden.
The days grow shorter, the nights longer.
The rain grows colder, the sunshine paler.
The full barn soon starts to empty.
'The wealth of heaven lasts forever.'
- From the Verses of the Months; Welsh, from about the 15th century
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
In the fading of the summer sun,
the shortening of days, cooling breeze,
swallows' flight and moonlight rays
We see the Creator's hand.
In the browning of leaves once green,
morning mists, autumn chill,
fruit that falls frost's first kiss
We see the Creator's hand.
We bless you, God of Seed and Harvest
And we bless each other
That the beauty of this world
And the love that created it
Might be expressed though our lives
And be a blessing to other.
- Modern Celtic Christian-style Samhain liturgy by John Birch ( http://www.faithandworship.com/Samhain_praying_though_the_Celtic_year.htm )
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Mary nurtures a Son in her womb:
His birth a blessing to those who discover him.
He goes forth like the sun,
Great is the number of his company.
- Old Welsh poem
(The church season of Advent is about to start - Christians in the winter awaiting the returning Sun...)
Monday, 31 October 2011
Sunday, 9 October 2011
There is a time for everything...
...and a season for everything under heaven.
- Ecclesiastes 3:1 (found in both the Jewish and Christian bibles).
I've been an enormous hermit all summer. Since May, when I got married, then flew to Israel for another wedding, then collapsed on the way home, I've been keeping myself away from the world of other people (gah) as much as possible. This often happens to me during the summer - which is no bad thing for a teacher and aspiring academic, as my calendar leans in the direction of winter anyway. This summer I went inside myself, and deeply explored my own spiritual path and choices. This led to past journeys being examined, specific choices being made, and roots being extended. Branches? Not so much. I don't like going out into the world. I am now semi-regularly attending a local Pagan moot, while studying for my bardic grade with OBOD. That's all because I need structure. But since I have a whole long history of deep involvement with church behind me (not always a positive experience), and since I'm still attending church when I can, I don't desperately want an active group to share in regular ritual with - at least, not yet. I'm sure that's something I'll benefit from later. And I am attending open rituals occasionally. But mostly, my religious practice has been very, very personal recently. (And with an episode on the difference between religion and spirituality coming up for 'Divine Community', I'm interested to see myself defining it as religious practice!)
But now things are moving on, and I'm supposed to go back out into the world. I'm supposed to be beginning to reap the harvest of a summer of work, and finding new ways to plant, as a result. I'm back at uni, making a vague effort to focus on my studies, and of course the new podcast is one of the ways I'm responding to a call I feel to be engaging with the world. It's absolutely my calling, as a teacher and student of a lot of things - and I've always felt this calling to teach, to share experience, and to learn. But I would really rather not. I get scared. I'm scared because my university is putting a lot of pressure on me, and I'm concerned I'm going to fold under it and not be able to finish my thesis (I've barely begun, so this is a bit of a silly one, but there you go). I'm scared that my podcast will be widely hated by the Pagan community because I won't be perceived as a 'real' Pagan, or because I don't know enough about Paganism/religion in general. What's the only thing you can do with fear? Well, you can run away, but eventually life catches up with you. But the other thing you can do is face it. Get back on the horse, and all that. (Note: the horse is metaphorical. I've only had one riding lesson in my entire life, and I was terrified and never did get back on the actual horse. Ahem.)
I'm being blessed enough to be able to worship deities of battle and strength, as well as to honour Scathach (pronounced Skya), a warrior figure who is somewhere between an ancestor and a goddess for some who follow a Celtic spirituality. This was a great shock to me. I thought that the deities who would call to me most would be the peace-making ones. And some of those are becoming important to me too. But the impression I get is that the Celtic deities think I've had quite enough of submission and acquiescence. Not that the deities of peace are about that either, but too much work with them early on and I might get the wrong idea and start to give in to my doormat tendencies, which already run rampant in my life. The gods who are becoming my gods are keen for me to face life a lot more directly. To get in touch with my own power, authority, and sovereignty over my own life.
Which means going back into the fray and dealing with problems, and with society. Did I mention that I really, really hate doing that? Which, y'know, is ironic for a sociologist. ("And given my lifelong search for irony you can imagine how happy I am." - Phoebe, 'Friends') Ah well. I'm working on it. And with that, I return to work on the never-ending literature review. This week: which aspects of Christianity can be seen as a 'new religious movement'? See you all later. (And do please download the podcast! Go on - make me less nervous. Thank you!)
- Ecclesiastes 3:1 (found in both the Jewish and Christian bibles).
I've been an enormous hermit all summer. Since May, when I got married, then flew to Israel for another wedding, then collapsed on the way home, I've been keeping myself away from the world of other people (gah) as much as possible. This often happens to me during the summer - which is no bad thing for a teacher and aspiring academic, as my calendar leans in the direction of winter anyway. This summer I went inside myself, and deeply explored my own spiritual path and choices. This led to past journeys being examined, specific choices being made, and roots being extended. Branches? Not so much. I don't like going out into the world. I am now semi-regularly attending a local Pagan moot, while studying for my bardic grade with OBOD. That's all because I need structure. But since I have a whole long history of deep involvement with church behind me (not always a positive experience), and since I'm still attending church when I can, I don't desperately want an active group to share in regular ritual with - at least, not yet. I'm sure that's something I'll benefit from later. And I am attending open rituals occasionally. But mostly, my religious practice has been very, very personal recently. (And with an episode on the difference between religion and spirituality coming up for 'Divine Community', I'm interested to see myself defining it as religious practice!)
But now things are moving on, and I'm supposed to go back out into the world. I'm supposed to be beginning to reap the harvest of a summer of work, and finding new ways to plant, as a result. I'm back at uni, making a vague effort to focus on my studies, and of course the new podcast is one of the ways I'm responding to a call I feel to be engaging with the world. It's absolutely my calling, as a teacher and student of a lot of things - and I've always felt this calling to teach, to share experience, and to learn. But I would really rather not. I get scared. I'm scared because my university is putting a lot of pressure on me, and I'm concerned I'm going to fold under it and not be able to finish my thesis (I've barely begun, so this is a bit of a silly one, but there you go). I'm scared that my podcast will be widely hated by the Pagan community because I won't be perceived as a 'real' Pagan, or because I don't know enough about Paganism/religion in general. What's the only thing you can do with fear? Well, you can run away, but eventually life catches up with you. But the other thing you can do is face it. Get back on the horse, and all that. (Note: the horse is metaphorical. I've only had one riding lesson in my entire life, and I was terrified and never did get back on the actual horse. Ahem.)
I'm being blessed enough to be able to worship deities of battle and strength, as well as to honour Scathach (pronounced Skya), a warrior figure who is somewhere between an ancestor and a goddess for some who follow a Celtic spirituality. This was a great shock to me. I thought that the deities who would call to me most would be the peace-making ones. And some of those are becoming important to me too. But the impression I get is that the Celtic deities think I've had quite enough of submission and acquiescence. Not that the deities of peace are about that either, but too much work with them early on and I might get the wrong idea and start to give in to my doormat tendencies, which already run rampant in my life. The gods who are becoming my gods are keen for me to face life a lot more directly. To get in touch with my own power, authority, and sovereignty over my own life.
Which means going back into the fray and dealing with problems, and with society. Did I mention that I really, really hate doing that? Which, y'know, is ironic for a sociologist. ("And given my lifelong search for irony you can imagine how happy I am." - Phoebe, 'Friends') Ah well. I'm working on it. And with that, I return to work on the never-ending literature review. This week: which aspects of Christianity can be seen as a 'new religious movement'? See you all later. (And do please download the podcast! Go on - make me less nervous. Thank you!)
It's Autumn in Britain, and absolutely beautiful.
Friday, 16 September 2011
Podcast! And religion!
My absence over the last few weeks has been due to a) much tiredness and b) putting all my leftover energy into The Podcast! That's right - Divine Community has started. If you're at all interested in religion and society, from a somewhat (but not solely) Pagan perspective, I think you'll enjoy this. You can subscribe in iTunes. We don't have an e-mail address for the show (because Amadore is incredibly busy, and I am both busy and on the autistic spectrum!) but we have a blog where you comment with feedback, and we hope to get a Facebook page and/or messageboard set up soon where people can discuss the issues raised in the show. I'm working on a new episode, in the meantime - with a sooper speshal (to me) guest co-host...!
In meMeME news, spirituality is chugging along, and continuing to make me so grateful that I finally found this path. I'm considering taking the OBOD course (or the new British Druid Order bardic course, which is a similar alternative). I've started an ancestor shrine over the past few weeks, which has opened the door for a surprising introduction from an ancient heroine. I've been doing a lot of reading, from both Pagan and academic sources, on Celtic culture and history. I already knew a lot - I've known some of the myths for years, thanks to having Irish family, and I've explored some of the pre-Christian history of Ireland before - but I've been trying to go deeper. I don't think I could ever be a Celtic reconstructionist*, because we just don't know how (or who) the ancient Celts worshiped. Taking all our cues on this from archaeology and Roman reports is just as dodgy, IMHO, as taking it all from the myths written down in the early Christian era. Ultimately, while I'd love it if we had as much knowledge of our history, culture and gods as some other reconstructionists do, we just don't. So if I meet a goddess who I identify with the myth of An Morrigan, that's what I'm going to call her. She won't mind - any more than she minds if I slightly mispronounce her name. She probably pre-dates the names we've given her anyway. And I mean, really - the Jews don't even know how the name of their god was originally pronounced. There are plenty of cultures where the deities seem to put up with a range of names and pronunciations!
Um, sorry for that diversion. My point was that, as great as it is to find out as much as we can about Celtic culture and worship, through archeology, history and myth (and I recommend Peter Harbison's and Barry Cunliffe's books for that), I personally don't think we can ever find enough evidence to reconstruct even a basic pantheon. I know there's a wide range of views on this, but I have mine. (For now!) So I'm not listening to those who want worshipers of Celtic gods to live like Iron Age Celts (how would I choose between Hallstatt and La Tene, for a start?!), or who insist that only deities whose names have been found on shrines or statues (mainly in Gaul) should be worshiped. I have no response to Gaulish or most Brythonic deities. It's the Irish and Welsh ones who call to me. Is this socially constructed, because I have Irish and Welsh family? Yes, to some extent, it probably is - I'm familiar with aspects of the cultures reflected in the Welsh and Irish myths, and I can imagine what kind of characters the Irish and Welsh would attribute to deities. On the other hand... it's easy to get lost in sociology and forget that spiritual experience matters too. These deities are real to me. I'm a polytheist (have been for a while actually!), and I may be moving towards becoming a 'hard' (or at least 'medium') polytheist. Yes, cultures create deities. But I think that deities also create cultures.
But I am drawing on the rich wisdom accumulated and shared by those who practice various types of Celtic Paganism, including reconstructionism. Most useful here, for me, are the hearth-based religious practices. As I think I hinted at in the podcast, I'm more about religion than spirituality. I'm incredibly happy for those who can follow a spiritual path without structure - but I really, really can't. I need little daily practices, rituals for creating sacred space where I can worship, etc. This doesn't need to involve institutional religion, but for me, it needs to involve personal religious practice. Offering nightly prayers to Bridget (as hearth/home goddess) and to the triple aspect of the Morrigan (as protector) are examples of this kind of thing. I need to do more reading around this kind of practice.
Anyway. Enough rambling. Please subscribe to the podcast! And tell me what you think! I hope you enjoy. :)
*All such statements are subject to change at any time, at my whim. So there.
In meMeME news, spirituality is chugging along, and continuing to make me so grateful that I finally found this path. I'm considering taking the OBOD course (or the new British Druid Order bardic course, which is a similar alternative). I've started an ancestor shrine over the past few weeks, which has opened the door for a surprising introduction from an ancient heroine. I've been doing a lot of reading, from both Pagan and academic sources, on Celtic culture and history. I already knew a lot - I've known some of the myths for years, thanks to having Irish family, and I've explored some of the pre-Christian history of Ireland before - but I've been trying to go deeper. I don't think I could ever be a Celtic reconstructionist*, because we just don't know how (or who) the ancient Celts worshiped. Taking all our cues on this from archaeology and Roman reports is just as dodgy, IMHO, as taking it all from the myths written down in the early Christian era. Ultimately, while I'd love it if we had as much knowledge of our history, culture and gods as some other reconstructionists do, we just don't. So if I meet a goddess who I identify with the myth of An Morrigan, that's what I'm going to call her. She won't mind - any more than she minds if I slightly mispronounce her name. She probably pre-dates the names we've given her anyway. And I mean, really - the Jews don't even know how the name of their god was originally pronounced. There are plenty of cultures where the deities seem to put up with a range of names and pronunciations!
Um, sorry for that diversion. My point was that, as great as it is to find out as much as we can about Celtic culture and worship, through archeology, history and myth (and I recommend Peter Harbison's and Barry Cunliffe's books for that), I personally don't think we can ever find enough evidence to reconstruct even a basic pantheon. I know there's a wide range of views on this, but I have mine. (For now!) So I'm not listening to those who want worshipers of Celtic gods to live like Iron Age Celts (how would I choose between Hallstatt and La Tene, for a start?!), or who insist that only deities whose names have been found on shrines or statues (mainly in Gaul) should be worshiped. I have no response to Gaulish or most Brythonic deities. It's the Irish and Welsh ones who call to me. Is this socially constructed, because I have Irish and Welsh family? Yes, to some extent, it probably is - I'm familiar with aspects of the cultures reflected in the Welsh and Irish myths, and I can imagine what kind of characters the Irish and Welsh would attribute to deities. On the other hand... it's easy to get lost in sociology and forget that spiritual experience matters too. These deities are real to me. I'm a polytheist (have been for a while actually!), and I may be moving towards becoming a 'hard' (or at least 'medium') polytheist. Yes, cultures create deities. But I think that deities also create cultures.
But I am drawing on the rich wisdom accumulated and shared by those who practice various types of Celtic Paganism, including reconstructionism. Most useful here, for me, are the hearth-based religious practices. As I think I hinted at in the podcast, I'm more about religion than spirituality. I'm incredibly happy for those who can follow a spiritual path without structure - but I really, really can't. I need little daily practices, rituals for creating sacred space where I can worship, etc. This doesn't need to involve institutional religion, but for me, it needs to involve personal religious practice. Offering nightly prayers to Bridget (as hearth/home goddess) and to the triple aspect of the Morrigan (as protector) are examples of this kind of thing. I need to do more reading around this kind of practice.
Anyway. Enough rambling. Please subscribe to the podcast! And tell me what you think! I hope you enjoy. :)
*All such statements are subject to change at any time, at my whim. So there.
Saturday, 20 August 2011
Labels, identities and causing offence
More than one twitter user appeared offended/confused about me when I 'follow friday'ed some Christians as well as some Pagans. Apparently real Pagans wouldn't follow Christians. This kind of anti-Christian nonsense really pisses me off, regardless of my faith or labels. Other people, from what I've observed, rush to prove their Pagan status under these kinds of doubts. I just stated that I'm not far enough along the path to be sure of labels. But even if I was, and even if I left the Church, I'd still follow the awesome, open-minded Christians whose feeds and blogs I enjoy so much. Like Soul Liberty Faith. You have to read the blog of this incredible woman whose unconditional friendship with local Pagans has lost her the support of her fellow Christians. This is someone who is embodying the open interfaith spirit that I long to see more of in our divided world. Why are Pagans so desperate to decry all Christians that they miss or ignore wonderful exceptions like this? Yes, there are some nasty, bigoted, cruel and exclusive Christians out there. Newsflash: there are a lot of Pagans out there who are very similar in their attitudes. I'm not accusing the tweeters who were confused about my religious identity of that. But I have already observed a lot of it, in my few short months in the Pagan community. And if I have to prove my religious purity to be part of a religion, whether it's Christianity or a Pagan path, then I don't want to be part of that religion. I've already had quite enough of the 'prove you're one of us' attitude from the more conservative Christians. I don't want to join a new faith and find I have to prove my 'Pagan-ness' there, too. I really don't care who's offended that I worship Jesus as well as Arianrhod. I haven't worked out my beliefs yet, and I don't honestly know how to square Christianity with my polytheistic beliefs. And they are polytheistic - I don't even have a Wiccan-style 'all gods are one god' belief to fall back on. The gods are many and that's why they're the gods, to me. I think the reason I (quite suddenly) believe this is that I met some deities who are in no way, shape or form anything like Jesus (or Yahweh, but I don't think I've ever met him). Deity is far too complex to be one, for me. There is probably one source of power or life that humans and gods alike emerge from. But increasingly, there's going to be absolutely no way that I can say the 'I believe in one god' line in the Christian creed.
Which brings me to the other problem of labels I've had this week. Someone very close to me, an atheist of all things, accused me of not knowing what I believe and lying to people by calling myself a Christian. She is so upset about it that, although I know these are her insecurities and not mine, it's made me go back to worrying about deceiving people in church about my beliefs. It is a core aspect of my values that honesty is one of the most important things in a community. It's one of the things I value most about myself - I am honest to the point of stupidity. For now, my conclusion is that I need to take some more time off church (at least in my official choirgirl role - I can visit sometimes) and use the time wisely to keep working on my beliefs. I'm studying and experiencing things all the time (more later on the land spirits/local deities here in Scotland). That's definitely helping me to sort out my own beliefs. Equally, though, my lifetime of experiences as an aspiring mystic and interfaith theologist is helping immensely. Paganism is the path I'm moving towards, but the Divine is far, far bigger than one path. I've always believed that God is bigger than Christianity. That belief continues to sustain me now. Whatever else changes in my life, the Divine is constant. My lifelong aim is to experience more of the Divine. That has not changed. Those of you who think Neo-Paganism has all the answers, remember how many hundreds of other spiritual paths also have a part of the truth, and some have done for thousands of years, from Zoroastrianism to Zen Buddhism. We will never understand everything about the Divine. Let's learn from those who mistakenly think that they do, and be humble.
Tuesday, 9 August 2011
Expressions of Community
On Sunday I went to my first Pagan Pride event. The only event of its kind in the UK, it happens to be held in the town where I currently live, which is convenient! I wasn't sure whether I should go to this, but everyone was talking about it so positively that I thought I'd give it a go. It was brilliant! The sense I came away with was community within which I can be solitary. I'm not talking about solitary practice, exactly (in fact I met members of the British Druid Order and am thinking of getting involved in a local grove's open rituals). I mean the kind of solitary where I walk my own path (and let's face it - my path is particularly individual!) while also being part of something bigger. I don't feel this in the Christian community. There's too much 'we should all believe exactly the same' rubbish. The heterodoxy of Paganism, the multiplicity and plurality of 'many wells, one river', is very appealing indeed (and very in tune with my Gnostic theology). And I met some great people, and bought a few lovely things (my new wooden owl has pride of place on my working altar), and heard some interesting talks and some fab storytelling and a couple of great bands, and generally had a lovely, very peaceful day. And the park where it was held gave me two Y-shaped sticks and a pine cone.
Meanwhile, riots have been raging across London for the past three nights, and last night they moved to other cities including my current town, as well as into parts of London that are minutes from where I used to live. I've lived in several areas of London over the years, and I grew up there, so it really is my home town and I love it. It's terrible to see shops and homes that I used to walk past every day going up in flames or being smashed to pieces. I'm stuck in bed today (as happens about once a week), but I've lit an orange candle for Brigid on my bedside table, and I'm going to try to keep it lit today. She feels like the goddess to call upon here - goddess of fire, goddess of peace. If you pray, please pray for the UK today. If you live here, do something to get involved - follow @riotcleanup on twitter for how you can help with the cleanup of the post-riot mess, or see the ukcleanup blog for inspiring images of communities working together on this. And watch twitter generally for emerging possibilities of how we as communities can help stop this madness. We are the problem. We are also the answer.
Podcast News
I am working on putting together the podcast I've been meaning to do for at least a year, since I discovered sociology podcasts and religion podcasts, and thought "Hey, someone should do a sociology of religion podcast... Oh." The BBC does a podcast along these lines, called Beyond Belief, but it's very theoretical and cerebral. I want to do something more accessible, more rooted in people's practice and beliefs in action. I'm writing about it here because I'm working on my 'words have power' approach - I need to do more of what I say I will do. (I'm notorious for making promises I don't keep, and that's not good enough).
So. This will be a 'society and religion' podcast from a reasonably Pagan perspective, but also not limited to one religion. I don't want it to be just me talking, though, because I don't really know very much. If you happen to know anyone of any religion who might be interested in talking to me, either just about their religious practice, or in relation to a topic (like debates around the role of religion in society today), then please let them know about this. And since I'm new to the Pagan path, I'd particularly like Pagan co-hosts, especially for more Paganism-themed shows. (No, I don't exactly know why I'm doing it from a slightly Pagan perspective, rather than a general one or a Christian one - although it's related to the idea of Paganism valuing plurality of belief, as I mentioned above. We'll see if more of an answer emerges!) If you want to contact me, it's @sophiacandle on twitter or sophia8catherine at gmail dot com by e-mail, or comment here. Get involved - I want YOU! [Pointing meaningfully.]
Right. I'm going back to not coping with my life, which I do so well! At least I have cats around me. Cats solve all problems. Them, and gardening. And chocolate.
Meanwhile, riots have been raging across London for the past three nights, and last night they moved to other cities including my current town, as well as into parts of London that are minutes from where I used to live. I've lived in several areas of London over the years, and I grew up there, so it really is my home town and I love it. It's terrible to see shops and homes that I used to walk past every day going up in flames or being smashed to pieces. I'm stuck in bed today (as happens about once a week), but I've lit an orange candle for Brigid on my bedside table, and I'm going to try to keep it lit today. She feels like the goddess to call upon here - goddess of fire, goddess of peace. If you pray, please pray for the UK today. If you live here, do something to get involved - follow @riotcleanup on twitter for how you can help with the cleanup of the post-riot mess, or see the ukcleanup blog for inspiring images of communities working together on this. And watch twitter generally for emerging possibilities of how we as communities can help stop this madness. We are the problem. We are also the answer.
Podcast News
I am working on putting together the podcast I've been meaning to do for at least a year, since I discovered sociology podcasts and religion podcasts, and thought "Hey, someone should do a sociology of religion podcast... Oh." The BBC does a podcast along these lines, called Beyond Belief, but it's very theoretical and cerebral. I want to do something more accessible, more rooted in people's practice and beliefs in action. I'm writing about it here because I'm working on my 'words have power' approach - I need to do more of what I say I will do. (I'm notorious for making promises I don't keep, and that's not good enough).
So. This will be a 'society and religion' podcast from a reasonably Pagan perspective, but also not limited to one religion. I don't want it to be just me talking, though, because I don't really know very much. If you happen to know anyone of any religion who might be interested in talking to me, either just about their religious practice, or in relation to a topic (like debates around the role of religion in society today), then please let them know about this. And since I'm new to the Pagan path, I'd particularly like Pagan co-hosts, especially for more Paganism-themed shows. (No, I don't exactly know why I'm doing it from a slightly Pagan perspective, rather than a general one or a Christian one - although it's related to the idea of Paganism valuing plurality of belief, as I mentioned above. We'll see if more of an answer emerges!) If you want to contact me, it's @sophiacandle on twitter or sophia8catherine at gmail dot com by e-mail, or comment here. Get involved - I want YOU! [Pointing meaningfully.]
Right. I'm going back to not coping with my life, which I do so well! At least I have cats around me. Cats solve all problems. Them, and gardening. And chocolate.
Monday, 1 August 2011
Closets and Churches and Belief Frameworks, Oh My
I had an interesting and very useful conversation with the curate from my church at the end of last week. We talked about Paganism and Christianity. She says there's no problem with continuing go to our church and continuing to take communion (which was hugely reassuring, not least because I find communion the most meaningful part of the service). She is completely comfortable with my mix of beliefs, and thinks that if it makes sense to me, it's no bad thing. We did talk about how, while I'm not planning to tell the whole church that I'm exploring Christo-Paganism, there may also be occasional times when I don't want to deceive, like when I'm in an intimate group belief discussion, such as the monthly Bible study I go to. She suggests framing my beliefs in a way that won't confuse or upset those who need Christianity to be Christianity, which is very sensible indeed.
How to frame, though - that's the question. Mentioning polytheism is probably out - most people I go to Bible study with would not be able to cope with that. On some level, though, I'm a pantheist or panentheist, and always have been, and that's not so confusing for most people. I'm still deciding whether, in church, I'm worshipping the ultimate force behind the divinity that is the universe, or merely a tribal god called YHWH who, some thousands of years ago, told his worshippers to prioritise worship of him and put other gods second ('You shall have no other gods before me'). At some point I have to work that out, although instinctively I feel that I worship a god-man who died and was reborn, rather than the Jewish tribal god which was the way which he particularly related to divinity while he was on earth. I'm not too bothered at the moment, really. In the end, in all my worship and mystical practice, I'm worshipping deity, an expression of the Divine.
It's handy that I'm moving on to Water Week in the Witch's Primer exercises. The focus is all on beliefs. I shall make some deity grids. Or possibly Venn diagrams.
As an aside, I told the curate I couldn't say the Creed at the moment (which was basically code for "I can't in good conscience say 'I believe in one God'"). She said, "So write your own..." ! We talked about how there have been so many Christian creeds over the years, that coming up with personal creeds to say quietly during the main one is probably nothing new. I'll write something this week. "I believe in the one great Divine, the source of all deities..." Ah, the aspiring mystic within me will be kept happy this week.
Meanwhile, I'm having a lovely summer off church, and thoroughly enjoying it. When I'm back from my holiday, in August, I'm planning to visit a few local churches for the purpose of my research (I need to identify churches that might be willing to participate in ethnography, which involves me observing what they do in a lot of detail). That should be very interesting. Especially if I bring The Wife, who wants to experience a mega-church of the mega-happy-clappy type. For an atheist, she's far too excited by religion. It's a bit disturbing.
How to frame, though - that's the question. Mentioning polytheism is probably out - most people I go to Bible study with would not be able to cope with that. On some level, though, I'm a pantheist or panentheist, and always have been, and that's not so confusing for most people. I'm still deciding whether, in church, I'm worshipping the ultimate force behind the divinity that is the universe, or merely a tribal god called YHWH who, some thousands of years ago, told his worshippers to prioritise worship of him and put other gods second ('You shall have no other gods before me'). At some point I have to work that out, although instinctively I feel that I worship a god-man who died and was reborn, rather than the Jewish tribal god which was the way which he particularly related to divinity while he was on earth. I'm not too bothered at the moment, really. In the end, in all my worship and mystical practice, I'm worshipping deity, an expression of the Divine.
It's handy that I'm moving on to Water Week in the Witch's Primer exercises. The focus is all on beliefs. I shall make some deity grids. Or possibly Venn diagrams.
As an aside, I told the curate I couldn't say the Creed at the moment (which was basically code for "I can't in good conscience say 'I believe in one God'"). She said, "So write your own..." ! We talked about how there have been so many Christian creeds over the years, that coming up with personal creeds to say quietly during the main one is probably nothing new. I'll write something this week. "I believe in the one great Divine, the source of all deities..." Ah, the aspiring mystic within me will be kept happy this week.
Meanwhile, I'm having a lovely summer off church, and thoroughly enjoying it. When I'm back from my holiday, in August, I'm planning to visit a few local churches for the purpose of my research (I need to identify churches that might be willing to participate in ethnography, which involves me observing what they do in a lot of detail). That should be very interesting. Especially if I bring The Wife, who wants to experience a mega-church of the mega-happy-clappy type. For an atheist, she's far too excited by religion. It's a bit disturbing.
Lammas? Lughnasadh? Yeah. That.
My local Pagan network and I went up a big hill to a stone circle for a ritual yesterday. A very big hill indeed. Despite what I said on Inciting a Riot the other week (!), I was really keen to join the group for this trip - mainly because the group leader was absolutely lovely, and consulted me about whether I'd be able to come before she advertised the trip. This is actually one of the more easily-accessible sites in the Peak District, the exceptionally hilly, very beautiful stretch of countryside near where I live. The rest of the group went on to an even more demanding site later!
The ritual itself was short but lovely. I called a corner, which was terrifying for my first group ritual (but I'm practising doing things I find scary. So there). It turned out to be a bit of a Lammas ritual. Some delicious cider was shared! I really enjoyed it, but it got me thinking. I understand that a lot of English Pagans are keen on using Anglo-Saxon names for the sabbats. For me, though, the trouble is not just that we don't have any evidence that these names were used pre-Christianity, but also that I simply can't relate to the English myths around the sabbats, at least not at the moment. Oak kings and holly kings, and John Barleycorn cut down so he can be reborn, is all lovely imagery, but for some reason is nothing that I can personally connect with. The ambiguity of the paradoxical Welsh and Irish myths that hearken to lost pre-history and ancient beliefs and customs, though - that works for me. I love how Lugh Lamfada can be seen as a sun or a grain god but is also not nearly that simple or easily reduced. Maybe that works for me because, in a belief system based on ancient Pagan customs that developed thousands of miles away from Ireland, another sun god is just as paradoxical in his is-he-isn't-he symbolism. (Like Lleu Llaw Gyffes, he too will die and be reborn as the wheel turns, albeit in a less intuitive order - Yeshua is born at Midwinter, then dies and rises in the Spring.) But maybe it also works for me for ancestral reasons, or maybe it's just because I'm a big one for stories and paradoxes as doorways to the mystical. Over at Pantheon, a devotee of Lugh tells us more about his myth and family. The richness of that myth is incredible, with generations and shifting ways of life encapsulated in a deceptively simple tale of sacrifice and plenty, death and rebirth.
So when I hear English Pagans talking about how we've inherited all the lore/terminology we need from the Anglo-Saxons, probably in reaction against an American fondness for all things Celtic, I also wonder whether reclaiming our own ancient roots and ancient terminology isn't also part of what makes Paganism the wonderful mix of traditions it is. My mother's family only left Ireland a generation ago, but that's not really the point. There's increasing archeological and even genetic evidence that Irish and British people are essentially one race, with far more intermixing between Celts and Anglo-Saxons than we once thought. And it's all about spiritual ancestry anyway - and mine is a mixed bag! So I'll go with Lughnasadh (or Gwyl Awst when I'm celebrating my Welsh side), in preference to Lammas. But I wish you a happy first summer harvest festival, whichever expression of the season you celebrate. Personally, I'm also celebrating the Christian season of Trinity at the moment. Now there's a confusing mix of personal traditions. :)
Oh, and as a result of my trip up the hill, I am now extremely sunburnt. Summer has finally realised it was due. My very Anglo-Irish skin tones were not expecting this.
,
The ritual itself was short but lovely. I called a corner, which was terrifying for my first group ritual (but I'm practising doing things I find scary. So there). It turned out to be a bit of a Lammas ritual. Some delicious cider was shared! I really enjoyed it, but it got me thinking. I understand that a lot of English Pagans are keen on using Anglo-Saxon names for the sabbats. For me, though, the trouble is not just that we don't have any evidence that these names were used pre-Christianity, but also that I simply can't relate to the English myths around the sabbats, at least not at the moment. Oak kings and holly kings, and John Barleycorn cut down so he can be reborn, is all lovely imagery, but for some reason is nothing that I can personally connect with. The ambiguity of the paradoxical Welsh and Irish myths that hearken to lost pre-history and ancient beliefs and customs, though - that works for me. I love how Lugh Lamfada can be seen as a sun or a grain god but is also not nearly that simple or easily reduced. Maybe that works for me because, in a belief system based on ancient Pagan customs that developed thousands of miles away from Ireland, another sun god is just as paradoxical in his is-he-isn't-he symbolism. (Like Lleu Llaw Gyffes, he too will die and be reborn as the wheel turns, albeit in a less intuitive order - Yeshua is born at Midwinter, then dies and rises in the Spring.) But maybe it also works for me for ancestral reasons, or maybe it's just because I'm a big one for stories and paradoxes as doorways to the mystical. Over at Pantheon, a devotee of Lugh tells us more about his myth and family. The richness of that myth is incredible, with generations and shifting ways of life encapsulated in a deceptively simple tale of sacrifice and plenty, death and rebirth.
So when I hear English Pagans talking about how we've inherited all the lore/terminology we need from the Anglo-Saxons, probably in reaction against an American fondness for all things Celtic, I also wonder whether reclaiming our own ancient roots and ancient terminology isn't also part of what makes Paganism the wonderful mix of traditions it is. My mother's family only left Ireland a generation ago, but that's not really the point. There's increasing archeological and even genetic evidence that Irish and British people are essentially one race, with far more intermixing between Celts and Anglo-Saxons than we once thought. And it's all about spiritual ancestry anyway - and mine is a mixed bag! So I'll go with Lughnasadh (or Gwyl Awst when I'm celebrating my Welsh side), in preference to Lammas. But I wish you a happy first summer harvest festival, whichever expression of the season you celebrate. Personally, I'm also celebrating the Christian season of Trinity at the moment. Now there's a confusing mix of personal traditions. :)
Oh, and as a result of my trip up the hill, I am now extremely sunburnt. Summer has finally realised it was due. My very Anglo-Irish skin tones were not expecting this.
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